Snow and orchids

We don't have many flowers 

But we have orchids:

Headlines and me

Since I write every day, I can see the impact of the headline or title of a piece.  I use the headline to decide what the writing is about but it uses me to set the angle, the setting of the piece.  When I read "Ancient Romans Performed Poorly", I am already set to find evidence that those people didn't do so well.  The process reminds me of what is usually "anchoring", a process popularized by Daniel Kahneman and Amos Tversky in their research on human tendencies.  In their work, I guess the initial idea related to prices and money.  Suppose I like your MASA cap and ask if it is for sale.  I think there is way too much cheer floating around and I want to promote less of it.  Suppose I like the idea of "Make America Sad Again."  You are willing to sell that precious cap and you quote a figure: "sure, I will sell you the cap for $15.00".  

A typical discussion of the anchoring phenomenon focuses on the quoted number: 15.  Let's say I come back with a counter-offer: "$10". If we offer back and forth with numbers in the neighborhood of the original $15, it served as an anchor.  

I might avoid the whole process by not offering to buy.  I might make the first quote: "How about I buy the cap for $8.00".  

The idea can apply to frames or situations other than numbers.  I looked up "anchoring" and found

Anchoring or focalism is a cognitive bias where an individual depends too heavily on an initial piece of information offered to make subsequent judgments during decision making. Once the value of this anchor is set, all future negotiations, arguments, estimates, etc. are discussed in relation to the anchor. Wikipedia

When Lynn went to graduate school, she landed among several professors working on postmodernism and related approaches to thought.  I just asked her to encapsulate the subject as she experienced it and she said it was an attempt to be conscious of a writer's meaning, a reader's takeaway meaning and any public typical meaning.

I recognize that writers, especially young writers trying to forge a career, may take a slant that I think is wrong-headed or inflammatory.  I also see that editors can be in a position to decide on a headline that may frighten or anger me into paying attention.

Tasting life

Yesterday, I asked blog readers to say what if anything lingers in their minds from reading posts here.  I haven't gotten many responses but I gather I have not been writing memorable phrases so much as suggested actions.

You might think I would know what I have been writing.  I have my own view of what I have been doing.  It's reviewing what matters to me, what stands out.  I am not trying to make money, sell goods or get subscribers.  I just want to note what I have been thinking and experiencing, what I have been perceiving and pondering:

https://fearfunandfiloz.blogspot.com/2008/03/thoughts-on-meditation.html

The situation is best captured by my experience of a bus ride through beautiful French and Italian countryside. I was the leader of the group and responsible for day-to-day upkeep of financial records. The ride provided a chance to get all my records up to date and temporarily relieve my worries about getting behind and failing in my duties. But, the countryside was very beautiful and I would probably not be coming this way again. Much like life, eh?

I could see that I might end the day with balanced books but no experience of the views, the one-time chance to see those places, those scenes.

What I wrote in 2008 still applies.  Like Michel de Montaigne, like Henry David Thoreau, like Dan Siegel, I am using the mechanism of the Fun, Fear and Filoz blog, the mechanism of my computer and keyboard, the mechanism of eye and ear and fingers and Blogger to be aware and re-aware of my life.  I enjoy reading a wide variety of books, watching tv and savoring other people.  When I write about doing those things, it is only natural that others might find the books, the tv and other people to enjoy.

What has been good?

If you have read any of the posts on the blog "Fear, Fun and Filoz", please let me know of any that stand out.  I purposely don't ask which were best.  I would like it if you can just take a second and zip off an email to me stating the subject or the idea or the words that have stuck with you.  If you visit the blog web page on a computer, you will see a list of some of the latest posts.  In the lower left corner of that display is an archive listing all posts since the beginning in 2008 with most recent at the top.  In the upper left corner, is a search window which can find posts containing stated words.  

If you look at the blog on a phone, below the list of the last few posts, are the words "Web Version".  Tap them if you want the display that includes the archive.

You don't need to do any searching.  You can just just send an email to Olderkirby at gmail dot com and say something like "you mentioned a book I liked" or "I remember laughing at a comment in the blog."  80 people get the posts by email and anyone anywhere in the world can see the posts on the web page.  50-60 around the world look at it from time to time each day.  

Gifts and multiple clipboards

Two matters of electronic communication

1. Don't underestimate the possible worth of sending a friend an ebook.  I favor the Amazon Kindle books.  Their prices are good, their selection is good and their system is convenient and quick.  When I first read that I could get a book without doing anything, I was quite impressed.  If I have a Kindle, a book can be delivered to it in a file that is sent through the atmosphere like a cellphone call.  Just as the phone system can find me anywhere and can accept and hold a voicemail, my Kindle needs to be powered and turned on to accept the file that constitutes a book.  If you send me a book that I find unacceptable, I can refuse to accept it.  

All I need to send a friend an ebook is an email address for that friend.  I search for the book in the Kindle store and, down the page, select "Buy for others".  I insert the email address.  The invitation to accept will be emailed by Amazon to that address with the message "I hope you enjoy the book".  I can change the message or add to it if I want to.  Some people are opposed to Amazon on principle so sending them a Kindle won't work.  A Kindle reader is my favorite device for reading ebooks but they can be read on all tablets and smartphones as well as on computers.  A person can also get books in e-form for the Barnes and Noble Nook and the Kobo ereader.  A tablet or smartphone can hold the app for Kindle and the Noon and the Kobo all at the same time.

Of course, many important books predate the Kindle (2008).  If a book is truly a classic, say Gullier's Travels, it may be available in Kindle form.  That particular book is available at no cost.  You could download a copy right now.

2.  On a Windows computer in the lower left corner of the keyboard, there is a Windows key. 

Using that key and V instead of Control-V, provides 24 different clipboards which can be used as desired.  I learned this from the newsletter How to Geek.  I copy the title of a blog post as usual, using Control-V.  I go ahead and copy the body of the post with Control-V.  Then, I paste the title using Windows-V.  Up comes a menu of the saved title and the saved body.  I select the item I want and click to paste.  

Now's the time

I am in my eighties.  Damn it, I should have life figured out by now. I have studied.  I read plenty.  You could find me laid out on the floor in my house.  You could find that I didn't wake up this morning.  Of course, I might be the first of my kind to live 160 years.  It is usually about here that friends say, "Maybe, but what kind of living would that be?"

The point is that after all that reading and studying and thinking and pondering and considering, I still don't know.  I mean how long is it going to be before I have the answers?  I really think I have as many questions now as I did when I was only 40. I am beginning to see that learning and reading can lead to more questions, not less.  

I told my clever wife about this problem and she said,"Answers to what?"  That is like a woman, isn't it?  To everything, damnit!  By this time, I should have it all figured out and know all the answers.  All of them!  I am beginning to run low on time.  My Puritan ancestors had the right idea: try harder!  I have got to read faster, watch videos at a higher speed, let audiobooks run faster, too.  I have got to carry more books home from the library.  

Many guys look like they know it all.  Their faces look satisfied.  Some of them even say they have the answers.  Why them and not me?  I have paid my taxes and brushed my teeth.  I should be more solidly in the know than I am.  I have a PhD, for crying out loud!

I can tell you one thing: I better get some answers soon and good ones or else!

Love this, not that

You have a big generous heart and you care.  Not to be outdone cardiacally, my heart is big, too. You are worried about the world's aquifers.  I am interested in football injuries.  

What is the matter with me?  Don't I realize that we are creatures of water chemistry?  We must safeguard our water supplies.  Climate change endangers water, population size and growth endangers water, micro plastics endangers our water.  You want me to care, to worry, to use my old, battered fatigued body in the service of Water United.

What is wrong with you?  What is wrong with you?  Don't you realize that marvelous young men are driven to crash into each other, injure each other, sometimes deeply and permanently because of human drives to compete, to stand out, to be attractive to girls and women?  Football is warfare in another form.  I want you to care, to worry, to use your energies and funds to lessen football injuries and the practices, drives and customs that lead to them.

Yesterday, I wrote about important words, phrases or sayings that have caught and held my attention, in some cases for years and years.  One such saying is the title of the first chapter of Lisa Feldman Barrett's book, "7 ½ Lessons About the Brain".  Her first chapter is entitled "Your Brain is Not For Thinking".  Doesn't that ring in your mind?  My brain is not for thinking??!!  Don't be silly - of course it is.  So, what does this genius neuroscientist say the brain is for??  She says it is the body's manager, governing all the systems and factors that are essential for staying alive.

You may have noticed that we are living in an information age.  About 80% of us can read.  That means that we can get written reports as well as podcasts, videos, YouTube, Facebook comments, Instagram photos and ads, ads, ads.  Plus, we can get ads.  So, you see what happened.  You saw that alert sent out by Water United about the coming age of death by dehumidification while I watched that moving attachment by Traumatized Trainers on serious football injuries.  Your big heart got engaged while my big heart was being engaged elsewhere. Unhappily, we will probably see what's important differently, at least until we both watch both that film about the harm done to our elderly parents by fat-fingering. 

Important words

I ran into a security question the other day about a pet's name from years back.  I could not think of the name,  (Naturally, I did think of it about a half hour later.)  I wanted to think of some possible fake names and "Anselm" came to mind.  I don't know why.  I am not familiar with the saints.  Google tells me that there are more than ten thousand official Roman Catholic saints so I can't expect to master the list quickly.  

I have no idea why "Anselm" [an solm] came to mind.  I had heard of St. Anselm.  I looked him up later and the little bit I read about the man didn't enlighten me much.  I guess he lived about 1100 AD and was important in monastery and theological life of Europe at the time.  I could not figure what brought his name to mind while writing, but I suspect I saw something about a Spanish-speaking person named "Anselmo".  

My friend is a wide-ranging thinker and a highly educated man.  He read my blog post and delighted me with a single word response: "Anselm?"

I don't know why his scooping up the weirdest word in my post and tossing it back to me delighted me so much but it did.  I can savor a phrase or a comment for quite a while.  It is much like thinking of a tune over and over.

 My greatgrandson, exasperated with my advanced-level questions, said,'' Grandad, I'm just a kid!"  I love that!  I think of it often.  

My greatgranddaughter explained her revised feelings about being a bit homesick, said,"In the grand scheme of things, a week is a short time."  Love it!

 

Chade-Meng Tan said, “To meditate, you just need to have a mind”.  

And now, to these, I add “Anselm?”

---------------------------------------------------------------------

It is He that hath made us and not we ourselves

Of the making of books, there is no end.

 

bOt, I didn't do it!

I didn't pay attention and posted an email I received on my blog.  That post included a link to click if I wanted to unsubscribe.  I did not want to do that, but later, I got a notice to re-subscribe if I wanted.  I clicked on re-subscribe and went through the steps.  About a month later, that whole thing happened again.  Then, later, again.  Finally, I wrote to the management and described what happened.  A couple of days later, they told me a bot was unsubscribing me.

A what?  A bot, short for "robot", also called "web bot" and other names, is not made of metal.  It is software, a little program.  I don't know all the details but a short program can be written and set to "crawl" the internet, exploring web pages.  When it finds a link that it can recognize and click on, it does.  

The whole sequence of events came back to me when I read the Wired article here:

https://www.wired.com/story/ftc-scalper-bots-biden-cybersecurity-security-roundup/

I don't know much about web bots but I did look up "bots" today.  The link goes to a Wired magazine article about scalpers using bots to take possession of all the good seats offered online for an event, for the purpose of re-selling them at higher prices.  I gather that the Federal Trade Commission takes a dim view of such practices.  I thought of the online arrangements being made all over to get vaccinated.

As I looked up information about bots, I found that there are places where I can buy a bot.  I am confident I could learn to write bots but buying one might be quicker.  I saw a price range of something like $5-100.  The more sophisticated price range is $40,000 to $100,000.  I am not really in the market for buying or selling bots of any kind at this time.  

What did we call our snake?

When you call up and tell me it's George Washington calling, I am going to doubt you.  I know George was the first US president and that he died a long time ago.  You wouldn't do such a silly thing but the twists and turns of modern life can quickly scoot me into a mental space that I don't expect.  

Like others, I have many passwords.  More and more, passwords are required to be many characters.  Sometimes, I can make myself a new password.  Sometimes, I am required to make a new one.  After I make a new one, I need to be aware that the new one is current and the old one isn't.  Sometimes, I am required to answer a security question.  I often get to create the security question or select my choice from a list of available ones. 

Back then, we had a loveable little snake.  She would answer to her name when we called and we were all thrilled at the cuddly but muscular way she would constrict the blood flow to a hand when she wound herself around a wrist.  She was a big part of our day.  So, of course, when I constructed a security question in 1981, I chose "What is the name of your favorite pet?" But that snake died long ago.  I haven't thought of the little devil for years.  When the nice computer guy asks me to answer the security question I chose myself, I can't remember what we called it.  Anselm?  Fang?  Squeezy?  I can see that little thing in my mind but my mind has slowed.  You can't just take a random withdraw from my memory anymore.  Where's Lynn?  She would know what we called the damned thing.

Security questions and old passwords can suddenly loom up, blocking your path.  I honestly am the guy I say I am.  I wouldn't scam you, Sir.

Too busy

Every now and then, I find something or someone is too busy.  I am an American.  Don't I have a constitutional right to not be frustrated or put off because they are too busy?  I am not used to running into the problem of system overload and I don't like it. Do I look patient?  I'm not.  Let's hurry this along, please.

I live in a small city and we are used to having facilities and procedures that can accommodate our numbers nicely.  Ok, right now, we do have an unusual situation.  That new and unusual virus has come along and a vaccine has been developed for it.  In fact, three vaccines have been developed to stop the pest and there are 240 more, waiting in the wings.  It is a great business opportunity and as soon as I get my act together and my drug company founded, I am going to jump right into the game.  But as you can imagine, many locals are eager to get vaccinated against this Covid-19 so phone lines, appointment web pages, doctors offices can be too busy to talk to me about scheduling.  Our friend said between 45 and 120 minutes might be needed to wait on hold to get to talk to someone to make an appointment to get stuck in the arm.

Lynn had trouble with her Zoom account and tried to talk to their support people but she got a recording that said they were overwhelmed and just too busy.  Try again, later.

She loves the Facebook group "View from My Window".  It shows photos taken out peoples' windows from all over the world.  It is touching and thrilling and eye-opening to see backyards, front yards, sunsets, mountain tops, plains, waves.  But I can't expect my view to be posted anytime soon because the group is so popular that my picture, if it is accepted, won't be included for months.

I get about 20 emails each day, maybe five of them from actual people actually writing to me.  A good friend of mine is more active and gets about 125 emails each day.  It is not unusual for a post on this blog to get commented on three days after it is posted because people are so busy.  

Books coming up

I have found several new books that seem promising.  There are times when I find a book I want to read.  I haven't been inside the public or the university library for quite a while.  I do have many Kindle books.  I realize that the Nook, the Kobe and probably other ereaders are available but the pricing, the selection, the whole system of Amazon Kindle works very well for me and has for more than 10 years.  

We're All Doing Time: A Guide for Getting Free

Bo Lozoff

I am reading "Being Ram Dass" steadily.  I am enjoying the book and I feel that it is doing me good and improving my knowledge and my intuition about myself and others and how we operate.  Ram Dass and Lozoff and others tried to help incarcerated Americans use imprisonment as an opportunity to improve their minds and ways of being.  "We are all doing time" was a guideline to help the imprisoned see their jail time as an opportunity as well as an existential truth.  

The Hardest Job in the World: The American Presidency

John Dickerson

This author is said to be an experienced writer about American government and politics.  I like the title and I feel that no one person can be in touch with all aspects of the country and the government.  

Exercised: Why Something We Never Evolved to Do is Healthy and Rewarding

Daniel Lieberman

Lynn heard from this author yesterday on Wisconsin public radio while driving.  She told me a few tidbits that the author stated about exercise and they are just what I have been suspecting.  I looked him up and he is a Harvard professor of biology and evolutionary science.

Terror in the City of Champions: Murder, Baseball, and the Secret Society that Shocked Depression-era Detroit

Tom Stanton

I just heard about this book.  Mob and gang action is a steady feature of American life that didn't get much attention in school or college.

Faceless Killers: A Mystery (Kurt Wallander Mystery Book 1)

Henning Mankell

We have enjoyed Wallander books and movies.  This one was chosen by a book group I am in.

Being Ram Dass

Ram Dass

I am reading this lickety-split.  I have posted several Tweets from the book as "@olderkirby".  It is a good visit to a life and to the times of that life. Plus the man was a psychologist and serious meditator.

A Promised Land

Barack Obama

I am reading this aloud to Lynn.  We feel privileged to live in a time when a talented Black president and his impressive and valuable author wife have been the country's top executive.

Message length

I am interested in the limits message length imposes on our communication.  When I look up "message length" in Google, the first page of results is all about text messaging but the subject I am thinking about is much bigger.  Most teachers, professors and speakers are quite conscious of how long they have.  "We can give you one minute" for your introduction, "Classes here are 50 minutes long", Obama's memoir will be published in two volumes.  

Say my angel visits me.  She has a message of great importance.  I believe it but I really hope I don't fall asleep while listening to it.  Oh, she is delivering a written message, but like the cash register receipt that includes coupons and deals, it goes on and on and on.  I have flitty, flighty attention and my focus may wander before the message has been completely spoken.  I wear hearing aids and I may miss some of the important text.  I don't want to get into the business of how much I remember.  I can't even guarantee that I will understand all the heavenly terms nor that the whole business will be acceptable to me.

860.3 million words are one estimate of the number of words spoken in a whole life of an English speaker

So 860.3 million words certainly sounds like a lot. However, getting our heads around that number requires some perspective. Here goes: In one lifetime, the average person speaks the equivalent of the entire text of the complete 20-volume Oxford English Dictionary (OED) more than 14.5 times.Nov 12, 2015

How Many Words Do We Speak in a Lifetime? | ProEdit

That figure seems large enough that most important messages will at least fit in a lifetime's capacity. Note that we didn't get into words WRITTEN.

Text messages and Tweets and maybe other social media allow up to 280 characters.  Up to here, this post contains 1749 characters.  If the spaces are skipped, the count drops to 1435.

  

[By the way, see "Spaces Between Words" by Paul Saenger for the invention of spaces between words and the resulting development of silent reading. https://fearfunandfiloz.blogspot.com/2018/05/slow-silent-social-reading.html ]

Don't you think it can be romantic and intriguing if he sits down beside her and he only has time and opportunity to say one word to interest her?  Ok, one sentence.  Or, how about if you get a chance to speak to the Pope or the king or the president but he only has 10 seconds to listen?  

I have heard that "brevity is the soul of wit".  Google tells me the phrase is part of Shakespeare's "Hamlet" and that the speaker goes on and on.  Just like I have witnessed with speakers who say "quickly now".  Those words are a red flashing sign that the talk is being extended.  (471 words)

Peripheral vision

Not long ago, I read that it is not possible to be really aware of everything in my peripheral vision.  It's my vision, I can see things off to the side.  What do you mean, I can't be aware.  Well, I can be, if I try.  I can keep looking right at this monitor and see the mug of pens and tools on my desk out on the side of my vision.

I like to pay attention to my peripheral vision as a tool for showing myself parts of me that are not directly in my attention.  The Green Bay Packer Lionel Aldridge long ago explained the results of training he received to meditate and calm himself: pick an object or point in front and keep the eyes focused on it.  Without moving the head or the eyes, become aware of something in the peripheral vision and keep "watching it".  

I realize that we have other senses besides vision but I have not heard of peripheral hearing or peripheral smelling.  We have a book called "Listening below the noise".  It is definitely possible to attend to the flute part while the entire orchestra is playing.  I just tried sniffling a plate with onion, basil and cumin and I found I could concentrate on one scent, much like attending to the tympani in a performance.  As I have read before, what I do deliberately with my attention, matters very much.

No longer with us

Today is the anniversary of our deceased daughter's birth.  She died more than 10 years ago after suffering from mental illness for 20 years.  Lynn warned me that she was separated from reality but it was when our daughter left a message on our answering machine that we could both see that she was cripplingly delusional.  

I have heard that people who are floating in delusions often use their background to frame their thoughts.  A chemist or lab operator might find weird things having to do with data and science.  Our daughter was an art major in college and tended to think in terms of the arts.  She was often convinced that she had created or composed popular works for which she was not getting royalties and credit that she "deserved".  

Mental illness seems to still be a giant puzzle.  We hope that improvements can be made in diagnosis and treatment.

What mood to wear

I picture looking in a file cabinet drawer.   The folders are labeled with the names of moods.  I do get moods naturally so I don't have to choose a mood.  Merry Christmas, bills, time to eat, sore knee - there are always themes and experiences and people to think about.  So when I look through the folders, I am carrying a mood with me before I begin.  But Chade-Meng Tan (Joy on Demand) and David Eagleman (Livewired) and Lisa Feldman Barrett (7½  Lessons about the Brain)  have combined with my own experiences to show me that I can open this imaginary drawer and select my current mood.  

I don't have to go to the file drawer if I approve of my current mood.  Grouchy, wistful, confused, thankful, loving - like a diet of a wide variety of foods, a wide variety of moods seems satisfying and healthy.  Being sad after learning that a good friend is suffering is fully appropriate, so don't bother with choosing a different folder. I can be one-sided or childish and assume that being deeply happy is the right mood all the time.  Just keep choosing it?  No, that turns out to be overly simplistic and inadequate for the complexity of life and of me.  It's like the little kid who says ice cream and cake would be fine for all his food. It can seem like a view of heaven but it gets disgusting quickly.

It seems the key to getting into the mood I choose is attention.  Tara Brach's "R.A.I.N." steps help me check where I am currently, the first step.

R  Recognize

A  Accept

I    Investigate

N  Nurture

When I check my mood, I may find that it changes while being checked.  A more inquisitive, observational attitude may appear and be quite acceptable, helpful, even.

Much current thinking focuses on gratitude.  There are always dozens of things to be thankful for.  The past and the present contain lucky breaks, fine achievements, amazing love - lots to be grateful for. 

Cheers

It can help the mood if music is played.  I am still listening to the 4th movement of Beethoven's 9th "Choral" symphony as I drive on errands.

We have monotone overcast skies with no real sun and we have snow on the ground so everything is white.  A rather monochromatic decorating scheme.  Good music helps put color in our minds and moods and that can help our cheer level.  

I wrote nearly two years ago a blog post about the video on the Metropolitan Opera Company web site.  When I started playing a CD of famous opera choruses this morning, the "Chorus of the Hebrew Slaves" brought the Met's video to mind.  

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2VejTwFjwVI

YouTube is a treasure of music and movies of all types.  

Kindly acceptance

I had a weird growth on my back so I went to see the dermatologist.  He took one look at my face and said he needed to take a sample of a spot to send to a lab for analysis.  He gave me fluorouracil, which kills cells that have a tendency to turn cancerous.  I used it for weeks and things went well, but a weird looking spot developed on the side of my head.  I wanted him to take a look at it.  Lynn had an appointment with him today and we had the idea that I could tag long and ask him to glance at me to see if I needed an appointment.

I thought I might get refused entry.  I didn't have an appointment of my own.  I thought billing and procedure might dictate an official appointment for any entry.  I was appreciative of the polite acceptance by the door symptoms checker and the department secretary, the nurse, and the doctor.  He glanced and said I was ok and didn't need an appointment.

My book club selected a book that is about slavery and contains instances of magic realism.  I have read enough about slavery (and about WWII) and I wasn't interested.  Sometimes, I can lend a certain presence to the meetings and I may be able to make a helpful comment.  So, I met online later today.  Mostly, I kept my mouth shut but I did contribute a few comments.  I thought I might be asked if I had read the book but I never was.  

I am biased toward negativity.  I can remember mishaps and slights more easily than kindly acceptance.  So, I am recording both instances of quiet tolerance so that I have a record of them.

Sex. sin and concentration

I have heard of religious practices in which the holy name is attempted to be spoken continuously, all the time.  I often hear of struggles with sexual impulses and attractions and religious convictions that sex is bad, shameful but admittedly helpful in replenishing the population.  

This morning, I read Prof. J. Kreiner's Aeon article on medieval monks' practices to try to keep their mind on performing their duty to study and concentrate on holy writings and not get distracted.  

https://getpocket.com/explore/item/how-to-reduce-digital-distractions-advice-from-medieval-monks

Modern thinkers and analysts have had more centuries to invent questions and objections and doubts but they also have smartphones and tablets that have thousands of ways to distract and send minds into lustful and glutinous thoughts.  If our drives toward misbehavior and destruction are strong enough, we do find life better if drives are harnessed.  

Later, I read Dr. Srini Pillay's article on the brain's need for variety and its limited ability to concentrate.

https://getpocket.com/explore/item/your-brain-can-only-take-so-much-focus

His comments reminded me of my psychophysics class where we learned that our eyes are continuously moving and that those movements are essential to vision.  Movements called "saccades" refresh our vision continuously.  I also think of the phenomenon of walking away.  When programmers or mathematicians get stuck on an intractable problem, they learn to walk away for a while, take a nap or some sort of break.  When they return to working on the problem, it is often easier to see what's needed.  

Taken together, I think it makes sense to try to accept our design and wiring as it is.  When we first think of improvements, of complete heaven, we are often seduced into simple thinking.  We can decide on overly primitive ideas and principles that fail to account for the actual complexity of our lives and environments.

Wow! Look where we are!

This past Saturday was the anniversary of the birth of Simone de Beauvoir, existentialist and feminist philosopher.  Reading a little about her brought Sarah Bakewell to mind.  Sarah is a British writer and her blog is one of those that I get snippets of on my own blog page.  Sarah has written a couple of books about Michel de Montaigne, who lived in the 1500's.  She has also written In "At The Existential Cafe…" 

The usual explanation of existentialism is that it was a reaction to the pain, suffering and confusion in Europe at the end of World War II.  Ancient people in India and China, people during the Renaissance and its aftermath, explorers and settlers coming to the New World to live and many people looking around after a war or natural disaster have rather naturally asked themselves what life is about and how one can best live.  

It might be that once a human being is born, the experience and jubilation of completing that process would just persuade that person to simply rest on his laurels, having completed the miracle of growing from a fertilized egg into a full human being.  Of course, resting on laurels and achievements is usually put on the back burner and the search for a breast to suckle gets the focus.  Then, as the newborn matures, hormones and spirit rise up and new challenges of life are undertaken.  

As we learn to grapple with the complexities of our bodies, of aging at each age, of our cultures and religions and political and military ideas and goals, every once in a while, we get a chance to step back and look at our lives and histories.  Sometimes, we can focus on the fact of who we are, where we and our predecessors have been, on the surprises of existence.  Each time, a new set of observers and writers looks at human existence, promises are made to grasp what we are better and more effectively than has been done before.  

Will things ever work out?

We are trying the business of keeping all eating with a single eight hour period.  For us, it is 9:30 to 5:30.  We don't want to eat before 9:30, which is two hours later than we are used to.  We don't want to eat after 5:30, which is maybe 15 minutes early for us.  We have found statements that such a schedule has not proved very helpful for weight loss, but we are trying it anyway.  

This schedule does get us attending to the time and to our food and that is good.  We have time in parts of the day that are new for us.  Last night, we were finished with dinner and the dishes earlier than usual and it was a good time for a movie.  Many productions are too long to fit our time.  There have been times when we stopped halfway through and began at that point the next night.  

Emails and ads from Netflix have touted the popularity of their movie "Rebecca" and we watched it.  Lynn read the book by Daphne de Maurier as a young teen and she wanted to know if the movie was the same story.  Basically, it is.  I have heard of this book and author my whole life, but I didn't know the story or the book.  Rich elderly somewhat decrepit woman has a young woman as her assistant/aide.  They stay at a very high level hotel, probably in the south of France.  It is a wonderful, somewhat staid place.  Young assistant doll meets handsome, rich, attractive widower.  They start taking auto rides in his magnificent car.  They fall in love.  He proposes.  It's like totally grand - what's not to like?

Beware!  His "house" is too big, too dark, the head of house staff is far too brusk, nasty and cold.  We are rooting for Sweetie, but it doesn't look good nor welcoming nor especially safe.  The harder she tries, the worse things get.  Do you see where sex and love and wealth and high social class can lead?  Yike!

Basking

I wrote about pondering.  My friend said he doesn't ponder but yearns. I find I don't yearn much, but I do bask.  Do you bask?  

I know with virus problems and economic problems and political yelling and struggling, it can be hard to believe but some things are good.  When I am in the middle of something good, I like to bask in the good, the warm, the friendly, the tasty.  I noticed a decade ago that when I visited Lynn's elderly parents in the nursing home, they perked up for coffee.  They perked up for chocolate.  When a nice cup of coffee or tea or cocoa appears, it is wise to bask in the taste, the pleasure, the fellowship, the riches.  Just goes to show that even in your 90's, you can bask very effectively.

When he was only 44, Henry David Thoreau moved to Walden Pond.  He said he moved to the woods to live deliberately.  He didn't want to come to the end of his life and find that he hadn't lived.  I bet he was a good basker.  

A person that basks well and often, someone who extracts riches and contentment from basking, could be called a "baskard", in a sort of French word construction.  If you become outstanding in your basking, you may find others refer to you as a little baskard.

Summing it all up?

Today is Saturday.  A large group of people got into the US Capitol on Wednesday and disrupted the proceedings there.  Many commentators and thinkers are reacting to that event and related ones.  I have not read all that much about the people involved or events that occurred.  The best thing I have seen is this 

https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/elaminabdelmahmoud/trump-mob-social-media-insurrection

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I have been thinking about final words and summative comments and essays.  Humans know for sure that a newborn baby is helpless and needs everything done for it.  It can breathe and suckle and eliminate body waste and that is about all.  Food and warmth and protection are all needed.  So, we are accustomed to the idea that older humans know things.  

Another common stance among humans is fear of death, or at least a strong desire to avoid dying.  Strangely, a strong fear can lead to a respect for those who are more actively dying, those who are near death.  

Respect for and interest in those who have lived long and those who are near death often leads to a feeling that now that he or she is aged and close to death, now that he or she has seen the whole of a lifetime, maybe that person has some wisdom, some overview, some understanding of what life is all about.  There will almost always be some final words, the last words written or spoken.  However, those words may not be the most important ones.  

I read of a Zen master or guru who seemed to be crying out in the last moments against what he saw or thought.  If he or some leader or teacher or writer says in a final breath that all of what he wrote or stated earlier in life was in error or misguided, that doesn't guarantee that it was.  I like to be cautious about summing up.  I know that I can't remember all the things I have adhered to.  I certainly can't remember the circumstances that surrounded me at the time I advocated various principles and positions.  Depending what the topic is, I may or may not believe in what I did yesterday.  

Prof. Rhonda Magee

I keep saying "Meditate" but people don't believe me.  They should.  I am not saying "Meditate" for me.  Well, accept for the fact that I feel I am doing my part if I tell about the best tool, the cheapest aide, the most effective and valuable and helpful thing a person can do for themselves.  

Just today, I learned about Prof. Rhonda Magee, a law professor and the author of "The Inner Work of Racial Justice: Healing Ourselves and Transforming Our Communities Through Mindfulness".  I am happy to see a law professor who knows and teaches meditation.  I expect to see all sorts of teachers, specialists and experts taking up meditation.  It can be a big help in facing fears, in searching out new ideas, finding a way forward in all sorts of difficulties and challenges.  

One of my books, maybe by Dan Harris or Chade Meng-Tan, says that meditation has a huge public relations problem.  That seems to be true and I think it stems from the simplicity of the activity.  I am confident that much about meditation uses symbols that look like this:

This depicts a person sitting on the floor or a cushion in a cross-legged position.  The implication can develop that this position is part of meditation.  I have to go to a bit of special effort to find this:

The point is to avoid internal stories and thinking.  It tends to work best if one picks a point in front of them and simply keeps looking at the same point.  What?  For a month?  The Google engineer Meng-tan says he and his two year old meditate for as long as an engineer can manage: two minutes.  He also says the minimum time is one full conscious, uncluttered, unadorned breath. 

You can see that a young attorney, a person in a bad divorce, a person facing criminal charges might all do well to learn calm acceptance of themselves and life.