I had a feeling I should not go. I don't practice that religion and I wasn't close to the guy. I taught with his wife and I like her very much. But on second thought, I said I would. Lynn said she was sensing such a switch coming.
I am glad I went. It was a demonstration of feelings and fears connected to death and to losing one's partner. This was also a good case of what can result in any marriage or partnership. A partner can decline slowly, for a very long time. We have many theories and stories of what happens when the decline ends. It is so dramatic and fearsome to change from a living, loving partner to a pre-corpse that we think about all the questions and possibilities. We develop hopes and recall teachings and thoughts.
I guess more is understood about losing a partner these days. I read years ago that some psychologists, thinking about shocks to the self, fixed on the loss of a mate as the deepest shock most people experience. Some weeks back, Lynn went away to visit her brother. She was gone for a few days. I was surprised to find how deeply I was affected.
I like what the book "Incognito" teaches about the large section of me that lives and breathes and matters but that is not much connected to my mind. We changed the location of the hand towel in the kitchen months ago and I still go to the wrong place to dry my hands. I should not have been surprised to find that one hand, one leg and one eye were missing in action when she was GONE! We are a well-known pair for disagreeing with each other but either of us missing will be a BIG adjustment.
