Many people have a cover story. A very common one is "I am busy, gainfully and respectably, of course. Besides, I am worried. I have duties, you see, and I am worried about the successful completion of them all. I don't want to fail to meet deadlines because the parts I need didn't arrive or I made a big mistake and had to start over." See? Worried and hardworking - so don't blame me or criticize me. Don't interrupt me or try to tempt me with goodies. I am busy and engaged.
When a lull happens at work or in family life, or when retirement comes, or a new job means oversight and quiet appraisal and thought, it can come as a surprise that outside of one's duties, there is a whole world. If the duties change or technology renders the job or the whole business or even the entire industry obsolete, it can be surprising to find that behind the cover, a person is tired or bored or confused. Many events as well as simply thinking can abruptly create a situation that is unfamiliar and question-provoking.
When we are thrown into a new situation or a deeply reflective mood, it can help to meditate for 10 timed minutes. A timer that will ring or otherwise alert us means that we can focus on simply looking or breathing until the time is up. Doing so improves our awareness of what is actually on our mind and what feelings we actually have. Sometimes, that awareness is a big help. But sometimes, as we become aware, we are able to see and feel loneliness, fear, doubt or general confusion.
At such times, getting a pad and pencil and making a list of problems, assets financial and otherwise, debts and difficulties. The list may clarify or it may show a need for further help or planning. It can help to know that having a big change can force a new and strange picture of yourself on you. Giving yourself a day or two to digest the new picture, get used to it can help, meditating each day.
Whatever the new situation, it can also help to read about it, Google the problem and simply recognize that plenty of other people have faced and are facing the same new challenge.
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Bill
Main blog: Fear, Fun and Filoz
Main web site: Kirbyvariety
