We all dream and plan. It is natural for smart animals with imaginations, like us. I am just offering a little tip on better dreaming, better planning on better times. The tip comes from the similarity between solitary confinement and a refreshing uplifting walk alone in the woods. When we plan heavens, we tend to seek perfection. We want to lie in the sun with someone who loves us, with a good book or a fine tv show with no rain or wind or bandits or elevated body temperatures.
Here's a tip: We are alive! We habituate. We grow accustomed. Think about it. You used to think that guy was magnetic. You couldn't get your eyes off him. But now, the "magic" has thinned and he is so irritating. Same with mushroom linguine. It used to be sooooo good! Now, you simply can't face another bowl of it. I am not proposing divorce or chocolate instead of pasta. But simply trying to remind myself and others that as Lisa Feldman Barrett says, my emotions come from me, from my animal wiring and my animal brain circuits. If I can allow myself to see some irritants, some errors, some downfalls as required for animal joy, I can open up to the value they bring.
I have often been impressed with Eckhart Tolle's advice for observing my own mind and emotions. He says to stay alert for the next thought I have. When I go on alert to see the next thought enter my mind, my brain freezes! It is a great tool. I can just be. Not be a cowboy or a rock star, not be a bum or a brain. Just be.
I know I am going to be disappointed if St. Peter says I can't come in because I have already been living heavenly but I never noticed. I am going to stop specifying smooth harps, and start enjoying my interesting stream of unexpected gifts and troubles.
