Before launching on a project of self improvement, I recommend a self checkup. Are you confident that you are not ok right now? Is the proposed self improvement really needed?
Take some actual paper and write the answers to such questions and ideas that emerge. Date the paper and wait a day or so. Meanwhile, take a walk, ride a bike, go to the gym and use the elliptical strider, attend a yoga class. Actually, any one of those activities would be good. You don't have to do them all. The idea is to put something else in your mind so you can return to the self improvement notes all fresh. If you are older and can't really remember what you wrote, all the better.
It can be helpful to consider some related issues. Are you already engaged in some personal project? Losing weight, saving money, restocking your supply of shirts? You have the right to drop previous projects, whether or not they are completed. It's like watching a tv show or reading a book (what's a book?). When you start watching or reading, you are in the dark. You can't know what it is like until you get into it. If you currently consider yourself to be behind in your reading, that feeling might be an additional self-help project you could consider.
Whether it is a book or a project of some other kind, you have been with yourself your whole life. You know yourself better than anybody does. If you feel a little bored or turned off, drop it. Make a note in your diary that you wanted to do X or be more Y or be less Z but now you are dropping or shelving that idea. Maybe you have heard of Prochaska & Norcross's "Changing for Good." It is free for Kindle users and about $5 to have copy mailed to you. Your local library can loan you a copy. One of the reasons that book comes to mind is that it says that the more times you have tried to make a change (stop smoking, less snacking, going to bed a little earlier, getting up a little earlier or whatever), the MORE likely you are to try again and to eventually succeed. You don't really need the book. I am just mentioning one of its messages.
Don't fall into the trap of taking a record of fails to mean you can't, aren't meant to, will never ever be where you want to be.
Of course, you have a right to simply accept your unimproved self as is. You aren't going to be totally perfect now or ever. You can return to your notes and reconsider. Do you really want to eat fewer carbs? Whatever the project is, give a minute (60 seconds but not days of agonizing) to see whether the project is still on your radar and would be desirable. Often, 5 seconds of consideration is enough to tell whether you want to do the thing or not.
One of my favorite coaches in this are is Cheri Huber. Her book, also called "Changing for Good", is subtitled "A Guide to Compassionate Self-discipline" and is a good source for ideas and wording to coax the best from yourself.
