Thursday, January 4, 2018

Enya, deep feminism and men

I consider humans to be highly advanced and complex.  I believe they have gotten that way through eons of evolution, effort and adventure.  I belong to the minor group of humans, the males.  Most of us do not consider ourselves the minor group.  We take ourselves seriously and consider ourselves to be fine, awesome, magnificent even.  However, all of both groups were born into this life as helpless infants parented, handled, instructed and dominated by larger people.  That and other mental and emotional factors makes us biased toward bigger people as better people. 

My group, the males, tend to grow bigger and heavier than the other group.  Human propensities tend to notice and be impressed by whoever is bigger and heavier.  My group gets reinforced regularly by regard and deference, and that sort of experience makes us even more convinced that we are pretty wonderful.  We ignore the sort of statements found in "Fighting for Life" by the Jesuit scholar Walter Ong that say, "Males are expendable".  We admit that the cows and the sheep and the deer get along very well with only a few males.  

I am married to a woman and have been for many years.  I feel that I am ok as a husband but I wouldn't mind improving.  So, when I saw Sounds True and Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes had an audio program called "How to Love a Woman," I bought it and started listening to it.  I have only listened to a little bit but I don't think I can stand any more.  

I read Robert May's "Sex and Fantasy" a long time ago.  His opinion is that the fundamental aspect of human femininity is caring while the fundamental aspect of human masculinity is pride.  I also read Judith Bardwick's "Psychology of Women" long ago.  Bardwick says that a fundamental fear for women is abandonment while a corresponding fear in men is being smothered.  "Meditation for Fidgety Skeptics" by Harris and Warren explains how low the first author's opinion of meditation was for most of his life.  He "ranked it right alongside aura readings, Enya, and the unironic use of the word "namaste."
Harris, Dan. Meditation for Fidgety Skeptics: A 10% Happier How-to Book (p. 4). Random House Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

I think of that remark when I hear Dr. Estes speak in what is to me, a overly warm voice.  It threatens to smother me with in a syrup of deep, deep, deeper affection, even warmer and more supportive and accepting of me and my immortal self. Yikes!  I ran away and I am staying away.  I will have to improve my husbandry using something else
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