Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Aid for the shrunken

I never grew very tall.  Compactness can be a virtue in smartphones and pocket knives but many studies show that women are naturally attracted to tall men and so are voters.  I have never wanted too many women but a couple of dozen is a nice number when a guy is young and unmarried.  When I realized in jr. high that I had grown as much as I was going to, I was very disappointed.  I was already taller than my dad and many other people but I would have liked to be 6 ft tall, I think.  I have had many male friends who are that tall and taller and have heard all sorts of stories about the disadvantages of height but I think out of friendliness, they have only given me one side of the story.  

I haven't bumped my head much and I haven't sought votes but I never had much height.  Now, to make matters even less inspiring, I have actually lost height.  As a friend who has also lost height in the latter years said,"Where does the height go?"  Apparently some of it slides into one's waistline.

Having to look up to talk to friends who used to be eye-to-eye is depressing, isn't it?  So, I plan to soon start a fund for lightweight plastic footstools to be supplied to those of us who have shrunk some. I envision a product that will resemble a cane or walking stick but change form at the press of a button.  The user would then have a footstool that will add about 6 inches to that person's height.  As everyone got used to such device use, we may have to ask our Oriental manufacturers to supply some in pink, camouflage, spring green and other stylish colors.

--
Bill
Main blog: Fear, Fun and Filoz
Main web site: Kirbyvariety


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