Buddha lived a long time before Jesus and he thought differently. No real surprise because he also lived in a different culture. Stories of the young Buddha explain his very human desire to find a path to happiness. He is famous for focusing on desires, wants as a basis for human suffering. I really want a bowl of chicken soup and I am disappointed that there is only chili. I am enjoying Dr. Mark Epstein's book "Open to Desire". This American psychiatrist knows Buddhism and he also knows current American ways of living, which clearly include desires for many things and experiences.
The book explains the common experience of hankering after a great bowl of chicken soup, only to find that this bowl isn't all that great. It is not as good as the bowl I remember getting last month. It is not as good as I hoped it would be. I will make some more next week and I will use better ingredients and greater care. I will eat it with some excellent bread. It will be really, really, really great. At least, I hope it is. I hope I don't feel disappointed again. Maybe I should just forget chicken soup. Maybe I should just eat bread and drink water. Maybe it is better not to have any hopes. That's it! Extinguish desires! If I desire to be without desires, maybe I will never be disappointed again.
Epstein explains that it can actually be helpful to expect to be disappointed sometimes and to just feel the disappointment. I don't have to blame myself or the soup. Besides, knowing a little about myself and psychology, I can throw in the knowledge that having chicken soup each day over the next week will lessen the delight and increase my feeling that chicken soup is pretty ordinary stuff. I can be confident that I will pay less attention to the next bowl. I can feel that chicken soup is not what it used to be or that I am not the chicken soup eater I used to be. Meanwhile, just as Buddha observed, I am beginning to want a good bowl of ham and bean soup. Yeah! That would be great!
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Bill
Main blog: Fear, Fun and Filoz
Main web site: Kirbyvariety
