was impressed and surprised by reading in Louann Brizendine's "The Male Brain" that men have a tendency to strongly desire a QUICK solution to problems. I rather thought I was the only one. I certainly didn't know that a woman doctor knew that about me. I hadn't found many clues in other men. I did see related clues. Much male behavior seems to be seeking to be outstanding, noticeable. So, the idea of "first" springs up. Be the FIRST to score, be the FIRST to finish. Often the FIRST is considered the best.
I have seen dozens of times that I feel impatient. I want the program to end, the lecture to be over, the task to be completed. I was impressed by reading in Walter Ong's "Fighting for Life" that "the female always wins because of her greater quiet". It doesn't take all that much experience to notice that thinking carefully and repeatedly about something may turn up a better approach than merely latching onto the first or most obvious reaction.
I do tend to notice when I feel impatient and that noticing is a help. Noticing can suggest trying to find a solution. That is a major reason that the idea of noticing what is going on inside one's self, usually labeled "mindfulness", is so popular. If I am angry or discouraged or confused but I overlook my state or deny its existence, I will not have as much chance to test it, consider it, savor and enjoy it, notice its antecedents and consequences. If I pick up a pen and jot down a few words about a problem, I strongly increase the chance of learning a good reaction or next step.
