I am tired of being pushed around by gravity

How would you like it if every time you leaned over too far, you fell?  I am an American.  I got rights!  I have put up with this arrangement for years and it is time for it to stop.  I am taking to the streets. Join me in my quest to free us from this astronomical bully.

You're probably going to tell me being subject to gravity is our heritage.  Our parents put up with it, our ancestors did.  It's part of our heritage.  Well, you know, the same thing can be said of measles.  But c'mon! That's no reason to put up with bruises, broken bones and worse.  Let's make humans free!