My friend has just finished "Born with Teeth". I am so ignorant of Star Trek that I didn't recognize the name "Kate Mulgrew" but when I saw her picture, I recognized her. I read the description of the book, much of which is about the tension between ambition in the larger world and the pull and tug of motherhood and parenting. It also says that Mulgrew studied with Stella Adler in New York and was told to find ways to make use of whatever happens in your life to broaden and deepen your knowledge of yourself and your ability to project that on stage. It doesn't matter whether what happens is happy or sad, what you want or what you don't want, use it, swallow it, digest it, engage with it, etc.
That is just what the Zen masters say about what comes to mind. When I get enraged, when I get sad, when I get whatever, look at what came and be one with it. Find its depth and breadth and learn to play with it.
That was the sort of idea I had when I thought about my latest blowup. There are times when the two people in my marriage get annoyed with each other. We have a history of not agreeing on the best way to drive and that was the cover story for our latest disagreement. We had gotten into arguments and shouting over the subject before.
I had never heard of Stella Adler a few days ago when I asked Lynn to try something to test my Zen-ish ability by trying to be intentionally argumentative while I was driving. She said she would be glad to do that. I put our deal in the back of my mind until I had driven us about two blocks when she said, "You know, the speed limit here is 25." I might have been going 27 and I was surprised at her warning. Then, I remembered! She was doing what I had asked. I laughed and she laughed. We had more laughs on that drive about my driving and her criticisms that we have ever had before.
At this rate, I may have such fun being criticized, I have to ask her for more negative remarks.
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Bill
Main blog: Fear, Fun and Filoz
Main web site: Kirbyvariety
