Are you crying?

Sometimes I cry.  Since it happens at the same time I feel some strong emotion, I figure it is a sign that several parts of my body agree that the moment is an emotional peak.  I don't know much about the actual mechanisms of the eye, brain and other parts to get crying started or stopped, I thought I would look up a bit about the subject.  I first looked up "tears" but realized that the link to crying was probably more related to what I am thinking about.

I have often felt that when I cry, I am just the same as I am before or after.  But I had heard as a boy that tears and crying were considered a sign of weakness and that, of course, "big boys don't cry".  I wanted to stand out as a big boy and was interested in being an acceptable version of a good male.  However, I never felt unmanned or hampered when I cried and I suspected that I could cry and still be tough, manly (or boy-ly), and reliable.  The link above leads to a Wikipedia article that reports a study of 300 people found men cried about once a month on average while women averaged five times a month.

Since I have never heard that big or little girls are not supposed to cry, I was surprised when, through their tears, they apologized for crying.  Why?

Now, I don't see any reason for anyone to apologize for crying.  It seems to be simply a physical marker of a highly emotional state. As pointed out in the text linked above, crying usually blurs one's vision.  It may make one's nose run or distort one's enunciation so that understanding anything said while crying is hard for others.  So, it might be necessary to stop talking while one cries and that can interfere with an agenda. 

Those with English or English-American background are often associated with little or no emotional displays.  I have that sort of background but I advocate crying without shame when the need arises.

For an Irish take on the subject, see:  http://www.independent.ie/lifestyle/boys-dont-cry-1449222.html