Friday, April 29, 2016

Press 1 for Mozart

The other day, I had to call my bank and within the bank, I had to visit four different departments by phone.  Each time, I had to wait a bit before anyone there could answer.  The bank phone system is set, as many are these days, to play some music while I wait for an answerer.  I think the music selected to play in such cases is interesting.  One company I know has the waiting person listen to a recorded lecture.  Whether it is music or speech, there is no identification of what I am hearing.  There is no way to continue listening, either from the beginning or from the point I last heard.  This system began anew each time I was put on hold.

This time, the music was an upbeat, musicbox-like melody.  I imagine different people have different reactions to the music.  Besides, hearing it while waiting the first time was quite different from hearing the merry little oblivious music, totally unaware of my growing impatience with the same tinkly notes the 2nd, 3rd and 4th times.

I mentioned that I had heard the same unappreciated music several times to one of the answerers.  He told me that he too, as an employee, has to phone different sections of the business and he too has to listen to the same music.  As with many systems, a taped voice assures me that my call is very important to the business and I will have a person momentarily.  That employees also listen to the music must be annoying but I do hope that they are not mechanically assured all day long that their call is important.

Recently, we had a talk in our lecture organization on the subject of "bullshit".  Looking into the subject a bit, I discovered the book "Your call is important to us: the truth about bullshit" by Laura Penny.  It seems that several authors are unconvinced by the words taped.

I have experienced waiting music so good that I did not want anyone to interrupt it.  I suggest a menu of more advanced and sensitive options:

Press 1 for Mozart's Magic Flute

Press 2 for Prince's Purple Rain

Press 3 for Adele's Goodbye

Press 4 for silence

Note: Pressing the # key after a choice will lock the recording on until you decide to hang up and call again later.

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