Tuesday, May 25, 2010

try a broader view

I know a lovely person who had a miserable time in high school because of problems with reading, with decoding letters into meaning.  As I learned about that experience, I could feel and see the desperation and pain.  They had been a burden, no doubt a costly one, since it not only hurt but damaged the internal view of self worth and future value and all that had to be borne, too, and repaired as much as possible.  Then, I heard about a much younger person, a college student, again with a fine mind but decoding difficulties, dyslexia.  That student was in the registrar's office and needed to fill out a form.  Knowing that he might misspell the name of his major, he asked the clerk how to spell it.  With a show of disgust, she told him and then said,"Don't forget to write your name on the form.  You know how to spell that, don't you?"  I think she meant her remark as an insult, maybe also an admonition that the spelling of everything important should be memorized as a matter of course and whoever fails to do that, is a dumb animal, far below genuine human level. 

Since I know people who haven't learned to stand up yet, much less write their name or anything else, I realize that writing your name is not always so easy.  As we get more globalized and the world shrinks, it is increasingly likely that others we run into will not speak English well, or even at all.  Since they may be tomorrow's billionaire or our state's next governor, it is not only good manners and good humanity but simple caution to use a broader view that just maybe a person having difficulty with directions or a map or a machine or currency has a language problem that we can't see.  When you find yourself in a country that doesn't even use the familiar Roman alphabet, let alone our words, you be will ever so thankful for the patient insightful person who reads your troubles and assists you politely.  There is no way to tell with some obstacles and handicaps that a person can't see or hear or is stunned by recent very bad news or got no sleep or just ate something that doesn't agree. 

As Mma Ramotswe told her husband, Mr. J.L.B. Matekoni, you don't change people by yelling at them.  Use the right tools for the job, which, as usual, are often the ones specified by Jesus and Buddha.

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