Marriage as a form of political rebellion

I am an Elizabeth Gilbert fan.  I didn't expect to find the book "Eat, Pray, Love" as wonderful as I did, I didn't expect to like the movie of the book starring Julia Roberts as much as I did.  The book's chapters on mediation are really good writing.

Having liked the book so much, I noticed her more recent book, Committed.  I read a short summary and was surprised.  At the end of "Eat", I thought her life was straightened out.  Not so.  She and her Brazilian businessman boyfriend had a much bigger challenge ahead.  All the details are in the book, which, like "Eat", is a true story, not fiction.  However, "Committed" is mostly an examination of attitudes toward marriage and what marriage tends to mean in different times of history and different places in the world.

When she got to the point of claiming that marriage can be undertaken as a form of resistance to society, I pulled up short.  Can't be.  Marriage is nearly always depicted as a light prison sentence for a man, even though the stats show just the opposite.  Being married helps men but not so much for women.  Still, marriage as a form of rebellion - no way.

However, with just a few sentences, Gilbert convinced me.  She said to look at marriage from the point of view of the state.  For a clearer picture, take a dictatorial, totalitarian state.  Such a state wants its citizens to be completely loyal to it.  But marriage emphasizes a different loyalty, to each other.  For a very long time, the state didn't pay attention to marriage.  I guess at first, the Church didn't either.  Well, accept for the recognition that it might be safer to have unmarriend priests to avoid that very split in loyalty.  

But over time, the Church and then the government got involved with rules and permissions and approval.  Gilbert makes a good case that the natural tendency to do so came from that same source, an attempt to hem in and harness and regulate citizens' loyalties.  Take a look at the book sometime and see what you think of her argument.

Bill
Main blog: Fear, Fun and Filoz
Main web site: Kirbyvariety