My dissertation is about decision theory so when I saw "The Art of Choosing" by Prof. Sheena Iyengar, I took a look at the book. I didn't know that she would introduce me to arranged marriages nor the fact that, worldwide, arranged marriages have a better longevity record than marriages where the woman and the man make their own choices. The chapter in Iyengar's book on her parents' marriage begins with the fact that her father and mother hadn't seen each other before the actual day of their wedding.
Iyengar is a professor in the Columbia University School of Business and she has been blind since childhood. She has a website of her own and on it, she is billed as the world's expert on choice. I suspect it might be a bit more appropriate to write that she is an expert on choice.
My wife and I have been married for 60 years and we feel as though we know something about choice, dating and finding a person we want to be with. We watched the first episode of "Indian Matchmaking" on Netflix and I think it seems very weird to hire a matchmaker to offer possible partners to my parents and me. The first episode showed the use of basic variables based on both the parents' wishes and those of the bride and groom.
I can see the possible value of having a professional and one's parents giving thought and advice in the matter of whom to date and what to look for. I rather doubt that such advice would have aimed me at the woman I am delighted to be with, and who has put up with me and even delighted in my company. Both of us had plenty of dating experience before deciding on marriage. I imagine that matters.
I just saw over the last few days an article on research findings that it isn't compatibility that matters as much as the sort of relation that gets built and maintained. In the Matchmaking episode, I was very aware that the mothers and the daughters seem to mention the importance of the man's height as the first criterion. Since I am short and shrinking still more, I might have been out of the question before even meeting anyone.
