Little children don't have any good reason to learn the first and last names of their grandparents. "Grandma" will do nicely and calling the same person by her first and last name will seem very strange. A few tries and you get a reprimand for being impolite so you switch back to "Grandma". It can take a long time to learn that Grandma is "Sweetheart" to her husband, "Mary Evelyn Jones" on her birth certificate, "Dr. Jones" at her job, "Mom" to Mommy, "Mrs. Jones" to the neighbors, and "Sis" to her sister. Her bowling team calls her "Trixie" because of her tricky curve balls.
As they age, children become conscious of the pictures hanging on the walls of their house and in Grandma's house. They learn that little girl is Grandma as she once was. There she is in her soccer shorts and shirt and there she is at her wedding. There she is as a young mother holding Mommy in her arms.
It is valuable to learn that Grandma has many sides to her and that the woman who answers to all those different names is the same woman they know.
The process reminds me of the quiet but steady process of children coming to understand what death is. Without a death of a loved one as a demonstration, children still come to understand that they are alive, that they too age and are heading to the state Grandma is currently in. The process of learning that Grandma has several identities is quiet and often without signposts or clear-cut steps but it proceeds and it educates about stages and meanings in life, all life.
--
Bill
Main blog: Fear, Fun and Filoz
Main web site: Kirbyvariety
