Friday, April 19, 2013

Sex or a cup of coffee

The rules change.  The purposes and steps toward them are different.  When about college age, the main goal was graduation, a job, and beginning a family.  After being retired for a while, it is clear that sex is less of a thrill, if it is not actually an imposition.  Advancing a career and raising children have been done.  It can seem that life is over and in a sense, it is.  Once one's children are grown, and even more so when the grandchildren are also grown, nature is typically done with us.  We may be fairly lively and ready to enjoy further adventures and new possibilities but they are generally of our own making.  We don't have the discipline of work or children's needs to structure our lives.

We don't have the energy to stay up all night, drinking several beers and staying alert for a hot date or maybe even THE ONE.  We have been around the block and some of us have been around the world.  It's not that there are no thrills left but we tend to want to know how much walking and climbing will be involved in proposed trips and adventures.  We are not muscled like Rambo and we are just fine with that.  We don't expect to turn heads and we like it that way.  Our women won't wear heels or bare waists.  Our waists may be the largest part of our bodies and clinging fabrics may be the last thing we want.

So, what do we like?  What do we want to do with ourselves and our time? If you are under 50, what we are after may well seem pointless or flavorless.  We like to read a good book.  We appreciate a glass of good wine.  Good music, likely by musicians the young don't know and don't want to know.  We like a good show but another bed scene may bore us.  Watching cars or buildings blow up is old hat.  Some of us get into politics, which is the art of getting your way when you aren't very likeable.  We may get into coaching or Meals on Wheels or ways we can help or advise others.  We become grateful for the attention of our mate or friends.  At our time in life, a well-made cup of coffee can be way more important that a romp.  If we are going to romp, we want a large well-made mattress and we don't do hay or back seats.  We prefer to camp in good hotels and we avoid fast food.

Our vision, hearing and memories may be poorer, which give us the advantage of not seeing, hearing or remembering much of what we don't want to bother with.  We realize our remaining time is limited and we can get rather picky about how we spend our time, our money and our hours of wakefulness.

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