Because we are actually wired to note and therefore think about exciting things rather than quiet things, I have been wondering about the comparative value of a lifetime of service v. a second of strong heroism.
Say, the parents are killed and the grandmother raises the kids. She is already past child-bearing age, which means nature didn't set her up for the high-energy needs of cooking, parenting, vigilance over friends, media, and moods that parents are called to do these days. But Grandma is in good shape and is devoted to the kids. So, for close to 20 years, she watches over the kids, loves them, encourages them, educates them, etc.
We switch the scene to an army patrol through dangerous territory. The second soldier in line sees a grenade fall on the ground near him. He has only seconds to decide what to do. He loves his fellows and wants to protect them. He throws himself on the grenade, taking the full explosion power into himself.
Is twenty or thirty years of effort superior to a quick death for others? The deceased soldier is admired and praised. The grandmother is admired some of the time by some of the grandchildren, especially as they get older and grasp what the grandmother did for them over the years. She still has her life and the affections of the kids while our soldier has whatever fate meets him after death and some posthumous medals and citations.
She never had a chance to dive on a grenade and he never had a chance to work day in and day out on the house and the lives of the kids.
Since I know that dramatic heroism is easier to notice and remember, I try to be conscious of the quiet gifts and sacrifices that create good lives without much splash or notice. I plan to try to get an answer at the pearly or fiery gates if I remember to inquire.
(copyedited by L.S. Kirby)
